About the Author – Chantelle Austin
Chantelle Austin is the pseudonym for relationship designer and lifestyle expert Rach. She is often seen in the media speaking openly about her swinging relationship and she wrote The Essential Guide for Adventurous Couples.
I tell you what; the women in the lifestyle are generally in the best position to get what they want and single women even more so! By the way, we call them “unicorns” because they are almost mythical creatures and they are very much in demand!
When you go onto any dating oriented website, the ratio of males to females is almost astronomical. The ladies really do get to pick and choose. Couples are close behind and the poor single guys have to prove they are better than their competition just to get a look in (that’s a whole other article). But it’s the single gals that really can get a lot from their swinging playmates and the lifestyle in general, so to the curious single gals out there, this article is for you.
I may have an ulterior motive on this one but meh, I can write what I want!
They want to try a threesome, the female of the couple is generally bi/bi-curious, and most women I know have tried it or continue to enjoy it. So they are looking for that special someone who wants no-strings-attached play dates with at least a woman (in most cases) and potentially a man too.
Couples find it harder, at times, to find another couple where they are both attracted to the other two. Often there is only one person that a partner is attracted to, so it takes more time to find the right people. For that reason, a single lady is ideal (and it’s not always about the girl on girl action).
Being a single lady in the scene means that you often get free entry into couples events (that sometimes cost couples over $100 to attend), invitations to come back repeatedly, referrals to other clubs/events/couples (as a playmate) and single ladies get to pick and choose who they play with. You could quite easily fill your phone contacts with couples you can call on to enjoy a night of no-strings-attached raunchiness.
The swinging scene is a playground that creates quite a safe space (no pressure environments and with the right people), for women to explore their sexuality, and to explore what sex has to offer with it’s various positions, a multitude of playmates who all have different skills and techniques, and a bunch of sexy people on the menu. I have personally learned more about how my body works, and discovered new ways to enjoy sex by being in the lifestyle. Oh and have met some very sexy people along the way!
The majority of couples have a very solid relationship so as long as your intention is purely physical; to have fun and then move on eventually, whether that’s after the first time or years from now, then couples are looking for you (no, really, they are… and lots of them!) For the same reason, they are safe to enjoy that physical fun with if you aren’t ready to settle down because they are already very happy in their relationship.
The best part is that couples generally treat their playmates with respect and are keen to have a single female join them on a regular basis; they will do their best to impress and take care of you. Some fantastic friendships with benefits have started this way… Sometimes couples even have a beloved single man in their friendship circle and cupid gets a look in. You just never know when you’re going to meet a special someone!
The majority of people in the lifestyle are committed to playing safe, and many couples have children so they are not likely to engage in unsafe sex. Many also get regularly tested and treated if anything shows up. It’s very important to the couples in the scene to be disease free and hygienic. Word can get around about who to avoid just as easily as about who to enjoy. For single women who want to play as safe as possible, the swinging couples are at the top of the list!
So if you are a woman who really enjoys sex, is open-minded, isn’t intentionally looking to settle down into a relationship, is curious or exploring sexuality, likes meeting new people and sometimes just wants some one-night stands without having to pick up some random in a pub/club, you may be the mythical unicorn in the room!
Released today is an exciting new novel by swinging lifestyle guru and best selling novelist, Cooper S. Beckett. Known for his best selling memoir My Life on the Swingset: Adventures in Swinging and Polyamory and host of Life on the Swingset: The Podcast, we are super excited to get stuck into his brand new novel, which takes us back to the beginning about being a newbie in the swinging lifestyle.
We all come to a point in our lives where we finally ask the ever-looming question, “Is this all there is?” And most of us coast along afterwards, just accepting that the answer to that question is probably, “Yes, this is it.” Sometimes, though, we’re lucky. Sometimes we run into the right people at the right time.
Ryan and Jennifer are at that point in their marriage, asking that question. Luckily, tonight at a friend’s holiday party, they’re about to run into those very right people at exactly the right time. Bruce and Paige have successfully crossed the Rubicon into the realm of “what else there is.” They’ve discovered delights and a way of living that Ryan and Jennifer have only ever dreamed about.
Their secret? Bruce and Paige are swingers. And very soon now, thanks to a chance meeting and a new friendship, Ryan and Jennifer will close their eyes, clasp hands, and jump into the deep end of life, exploring the untold wonders of sexuality. Hedonistic pleasures that they can’t even fathom yet, threesomes and sex parties and a deep connection with friends and with each other. The swinging lifestyle.
Today is the day they proclaim: “There is more.” Today is the day they change their lives.
Read a review and extract of the book over on the AMM blog page.
Purchase Cooper S. Beckett’s novel here.
About the Author – Chantelle Austin
Chantelle Austin is the pseudonym for relationship designer and lifestyle expert Rach. She is often seen in the media speaking openly about her swinging relationship and she wrote The Essential Guide for Adventurous Couples. You can read more of her articles on Adult Match Maker.
Well, it was me who was the first to suggest the idea, which shouldn’t be a surprise! I’ll share how I started it but I’ll also give you a few other suggestions because the way I did it isn’t necessarily the most practical nor easiest method to use.
Basically I gave him a threesome with another girl first (and what man is going to say no to that?) so my theory was that he “owed” me one. Can we see the logic? We did that early on in the relationship and it was a few years before we decided to see if we could find a second guy to play with. First time around we found this to be quite challenging and I had performance anxiety (that’s a whole other article) so it didn’t happen then.